Have you ever had a favorite teacher? Thinking back to my years in school, I can remember all of my teachers....every name and every grade. It's just one of those things I remember, kind of like birthdays, I guess. But, there was one teacher in particular who had a reputation, that she lived up to quite well, as being one of the meanest and strictest teachers in the school. Little did I know, the summer before my second grade year, when I found out that she was going to be my teacher, that she would, to this day leave an imprint on my life.
Mrs. Lasley was probably in her late thirties when I had her as my teacher. Of course, then I thought she was old - now that I myself am in my late thirties, I of course know better :) She had a certain look that she gave when she was upset or irritated at you, and the goal was to never get that look. However, being an 8 year old kid, sometimes you got the look no matter how hard you tried.
It was in December, of my second grade year, that I saw a different side to Mrs. Lasley. We were preparing to do a Christmas program at the school, (when you could still sing Christmas songs) and we were going to sing "Silent Night". She started telling us about her life growing up, and how both of her parents were deaf, due to a horse accident. Being unable to speak to her parents with her voice, she became very fluent in sign language, and that was how we were going to sing our song that year at the Christmas program...with our hands.
On the day of the program, after we performed Silent Night in sign language, we were in our class having a party. It was afterall, the last day of school before Christmas break. Suddenly she sat us all down, and had began taking small beautiful wooden ornaments out of a bag. Each one had our name on it, her name on it, and the date - 1981. She had carved and polished each one by hand, and wanted us to take them home and hang them on our tree...it was a gift. This teacher, who was known for being strict and mean, had made an impact on my heart, right then in that classroom . I never looked at her the same.
Though I still got in trouble that year, and had to put my head on my desk or do an extra assignment here and there, I always loved Mrs. Lasley. It wasn't that the gift she gave was elaborate, or that learning sign language has been a big part of my life. It was the spirit in which she was giving those things to us. It was from a pure heart, out of love, from a teacher, to her students. It impacted me. To this day, I still hang that star ornament on my tree every year.
I want to leave you with two questions. Who are the unexpected people in your life who have made a difference in one way or another? Maybe it was a teacher who believed in you when nobody else did, or a friend or relative that was just always there. Possibly it was a complete stranger that helped you in a time of need, or a nurse or doctor who made you feel like everything was going to be alright. The other question is, Who have you been there for? Are we looking for ways everyday to make an impact on the people we love or even complete strangers?
Through unexpected people many times come unexpected blessings.
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Friday, August 13, 2010
Bullying - Stop!
As a young girl, one of the toughest times I ever had to face was during the summer before my 7th grade year. Going in to junior high is never really easy, but it's especially not when you're being threatened. It didn't help that the school I was going to already had the reputation of bullying. You had to get by the "hoods" who stood right off the entrance of campus, smoking. If you were a newby (like I was going to be), then you had the possibility of getting initiated by either being thrown in a locker or shoved in a garbage can. Whether it was hype to scare people, or it really happened , I didn't know. All I did know, was one of the top "hoods" lived on the same block as I did, and she didn't like me.
My best friend, at the time, also lived on the same block, only down further. So, during the summer of 1986, every time I would walk to her house, I would have to pass by where the other girl lived. Now mind you, at one time we were friends. In fact, I had stayed the night with her before. But, sometimes, girls can be friends with you one minute and hate you the next...especially at that age. There would be a group of them, and everytime I would walk past their house they would yell out their window, "Hey B...., we're going to kick you a.." "Just wait for school to start b.... (and that is the nice version) It got to the point where I was so afraid, I wouldn't walk over to my friends house anymore, unless I took the long way, and went around a couple of blocks. This lasted all summer, and then one day, they decided to like me again. I guess in my case I was lucky. I was only bullied for a summer. However, bullying still goes on today, and in many cases it's not just for a summer.
Here are a few ways people can be bullied:
1. Verbal bullying including derogatory comments and bad names
2. Bullying through social exclusion or isolation
3. Physical bullying such as hitting, kicking, shoving, and spitting
4. Bullying through lies and false rumors
5. Having money or other things taken or damaged by students who bully
6. Being threatened or being forced to do things by students who bully
7. Racial bullying
8. Sexual bullying
9. Cyber bullying (via cell phone or Internet)
Some recent statistics on bullying are as follows:
- 1 out of 4 kids is Bullied. The American Justice Department says that this month 1 out of every 4 kids will be abused by another youth.
- Surveys Show That 77% of students are bullied mentally, verbally, & physically.
- In a recent study, 77% of the students said they had been bullied. And 14% of those who were bullied said they experienced severe (bad) reactions to the abuse.
- 1 out of 5 kids admits to being a bully, or doing some "Bullying."
- 8% of students miss 1 day of class per month for fear of Bullies.
- 43% fear harassment in the bathroom at school.
- 100,000 students carry a gun to school.
- 28% of youths who carry weapons have witnessed violence at home.
- A poll of teens ages 12-17 proved that they think violence increased at their schools.
- 282,000 students are physically attacked in secondary schools each month.
- More youth violence occurs on school grounds as opposed to on the way to school.
- Playground statistics - Every 7 minutes a child is bullied. Adult intervention - 4%. Peer intervention - 11%. No intervention - 85%.
There have been so many stories, movies, and articles on bullying over the last few years, and eveytime I see one, it makes me sad. Many times, the result of it can be suicide. Though in no way do I condone suicide, no matter what the situation, I can't imagine what it must feel like to be taunted, teased, threatened, excluded, and set up to fail every day by people. Though I mentioned girls earlier, that lovely age between 11 and 15 where they can be down right mean at times, you see this in boys also. Girls, many times will take the hurt inward. Boys, however, many times will take the hurt outward...in violence.
Whether directly or indirectly we have all been touched by bullying. We may even have been the bully at one time, like the girl who lived on my block. I think it's important that we pay attention to it more, especially with our own children, and talk about it. If you see them involved in it in any way, confront it. If we, as adults, are involved in it...STOP! Our kids learn from our actions and responses. Let's not keep silent. Lets agree to talk about it, before it's too late.
My best friend, at the time, also lived on the same block, only down further. So, during the summer of 1986, every time I would walk to her house, I would have to pass by where the other girl lived. Now mind you, at one time we were friends. In fact, I had stayed the night with her before. But, sometimes, girls can be friends with you one minute and hate you the next...especially at that age. There would be a group of them, and everytime I would walk past their house they would yell out their window, "Hey B...., we're going to kick you a.." "Just wait for school to start b.... (and that is the nice version) It got to the point where I was so afraid, I wouldn't walk over to my friends house anymore, unless I took the long way, and went around a couple of blocks. This lasted all summer, and then one day, they decided to like me again. I guess in my case I was lucky. I was only bullied for a summer. However, bullying still goes on today, and in many cases it's not just for a summer.
Here are a few ways people can be bullied:
1. Verbal bullying including derogatory comments and bad names
2. Bullying through social exclusion or isolation
3. Physical bullying such as hitting, kicking, shoving, and spitting
4. Bullying through lies and false rumors
5. Having money or other things taken or damaged by students who bully
6. Being threatened or being forced to do things by students who bully
7. Racial bullying
8. Sexual bullying
9. Cyber bullying (via cell phone or Internet)
Some recent statistics on bullying are as follows:
- 1 out of 4 kids is Bullied. The American Justice Department says that this month 1 out of every 4 kids will be abused by another youth.
- Surveys Show That 77% of students are bullied mentally, verbally, & physically.
- In a recent study, 77% of the students said they had been bullied. And 14% of those who were bullied said they experienced severe (bad) reactions to the abuse.
- 1 out of 5 kids admits to being a bully, or doing some "Bullying."
- 8% of students miss 1 day of class per month for fear of Bullies.
- 43% fear harassment in the bathroom at school.
- 100,000 students carry a gun to school.
- 28% of youths who carry weapons have witnessed violence at home.
- A poll of teens ages 12-17 proved that they think violence increased at their schools.
- 282,000 students are physically attacked in secondary schools each month.
- More youth violence occurs on school grounds as opposed to on the way to school.
- Playground statistics - Every 7 minutes a child is bullied. Adult intervention - 4%. Peer intervention - 11%. No intervention - 85%.
There have been so many stories, movies, and articles on bullying over the last few years, and eveytime I see one, it makes me sad. Many times, the result of it can be suicide. Though in no way do I condone suicide, no matter what the situation, I can't imagine what it must feel like to be taunted, teased, threatened, excluded, and set up to fail every day by people. Though I mentioned girls earlier, that lovely age between 11 and 15 where they can be down right mean at times, you see this in boys also. Girls, many times will take the hurt inward. Boys, however, many times will take the hurt outward...in violence.
Whether directly or indirectly we have all been touched by bullying. We may even have been the bully at one time, like the girl who lived on my block. I think it's important that we pay attention to it more, especially with our own children, and talk about it. If you see them involved in it in any way, confront it. If we, as adults, are involved in it...STOP! Our kids learn from our actions and responses. Let's not keep silent. Lets agree to talk about it, before it's too late.
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Being Happy With Where You're At
Have you ever thought to yourself, "I wish I was doing something else?" It's so easy sometimes to get discontent with where you are at. It could be a job situation, a place in life, or any number of things. People will feel that way a lot before they are Christians, because no matter what they do they still feel like something is missing. But even after we receive Christ, most of us would agree, that there are still times when you find yourself thinking the same thought.
In my blog "Season's Change", I went in more detail about how I struggled for a long time with where I was at in my life. Many times when you're in that place you feel very lonely, and besides the question, "I wish I was doing something else", you also ask, "Who am I ?" You try to be this for this person, and that for that person, and in many cases we lose perspective of WHY we are doing the things we're doing in the first place. So many of us have many roles to fulfill. For me I am a wife, mother, daycare provider, pastor's wife, mentor, daughter, friend, etc. In every area, I have to ask myself consistantly, "why am I these things?"
An example that comes to my mind is in the area of homeschooling. There have been times I have wanted to quit sooooo bad, and I would get so frustrated. It wasn't until someone finally suggested to me, to remember WHY I was homeschooling in the first place. When I did that, when I remembered the goal, it helped me so much. In the hard times, when I wanted to give up, it was comforting to know there was a reason why I was doing it. I now see the fruit in my children's lives.
No matter where you are in your life right at this moment, remind yourself why you're doing what you're doing. If you're in a job that you don't like - remind yourself that it's for a season, and for now you're bringing in a paycheck, or getting trained for something better. If you are single and waiting to be in a relationship - then remind yoursef that it's all in God's timing and that He will bring you the right person. You are waiting because you know God's choice is always right and you are a beautiful example to others who are also waiting. If you are in times of transition, then remind yourself to be joyful for today, and for the victories that today brings - God is the one who forms our tomorrows.
Renewing our minds in this area is not always easy, but it is necessary. One of the things that was first spoken to us as new Christians was that we were in need of patience. That with patience, we would be lacking nothing. I have to remind myself of that often - be patient - the steps of a righteous man are ordered by the Lord.
Find the balance of having vision for the future, yet being happy for where you're at today.
In my blog "Season's Change", I went in more detail about how I struggled for a long time with where I was at in my life. Many times when you're in that place you feel very lonely, and besides the question, "I wish I was doing something else", you also ask, "Who am I ?" You try to be this for this person, and that for that person, and in many cases we lose perspective of WHY we are doing the things we're doing in the first place. So many of us have many roles to fulfill. For me I am a wife, mother, daycare provider, pastor's wife, mentor, daughter, friend, etc. In every area, I have to ask myself consistantly, "why am I these things?"
An example that comes to my mind is in the area of homeschooling. There have been times I have wanted to quit sooooo bad, and I would get so frustrated. It wasn't until someone finally suggested to me, to remember WHY I was homeschooling in the first place. When I did that, when I remembered the goal, it helped me so much. In the hard times, when I wanted to give up, it was comforting to know there was a reason why I was doing it. I now see the fruit in my children's lives.
No matter where you are in your life right at this moment, remind yourself why you're doing what you're doing. If you're in a job that you don't like - remind yourself that it's for a season, and for now you're bringing in a paycheck, or getting trained for something better. If you are single and waiting to be in a relationship - then remind yoursef that it's all in God's timing and that He will bring you the right person. You are waiting because you know God's choice is always right and you are a beautiful example to others who are also waiting. If you are in times of transition, then remind yourself to be joyful for today, and for the victories that today brings - God is the one who forms our tomorrows.
Renewing our minds in this area is not always easy, but it is necessary. One of the things that was first spoken to us as new Christians was that we were in need of patience. That with patience, we would be lacking nothing. I have to remind myself of that often - be patient - the steps of a righteous man are ordered by the Lord.
Find the balance of having vision for the future, yet being happy for where you're at today.
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